During this time of isolation and being in close proximity of family members (perhaps those who you would not usually be around) It can be difficult to keep your sanity and avoid toxic behaviour and people. It can be as little as avoiding frequent conflicts.
I’ve found a great way to deal with toxic people is to not deal with them at all. Now, this is for the narcissist or overly stubborn people who whatever you say, however you say it. They will not change their mind and will never see your point of view. They may even get aggressive about it. For these people, honestly don’t bother. Just ignore it and go do something else or go elsewhere in the house, till they have calmed down or are bored of being angry.
If a family member can be aggressive physically and you are unable to leave said situation currently or are still dependant on them. I hope you can find a way to leave them ASAP or are figuring it out. Please don’t hesitate to anonymously message me to just talk about it with someone, I’m here for you.
Anger/sadness post confrontation
I like to go to my room usually and get working on something I need to do or a fun hobby I like to do, journal or blog and listen to some music. In fact, guess what I’m actually doing that right now. So there you go, a real time post argument activity to calm me down. You could also exercise or something. But I found music calms me and takes me elsewhere, filling me other emotions that I would prefer to feel, which for me in these types situations, is really what I need.
For the family members or partners who are more sane, try and get the situation to be calmer and less personal. Meaning, soften you tone, lower your voice and try and say things like “What’s really making you mad?” or “Listen because I love you, I’m gonna leave it but I honestly disagree”. They will at least calm down themselves and definitely feel more loved and thus less inclined to be angry or vicious towards you.
It’s probably worth looking at these to avoid future arguments or to try to avoid having any at all (probably a little unrealistic but you know).
How to avoid arguments occurring:
- Create separate and distance work stations/places
- Designate time during the day or create a schedule for yourself and others (if they haven’t already) in the household. So every knows they still have a routine and things to do. So that everyone isn’t just constantly on top of one another, following each other around everyday
- On the same note, why not have scheduled family bonding time. Be it a meal time, board game time. Tv show time. SO that you ca use this time to grow closer. I understand that some families aren’t like this and perhaps never will be. In which case maybe a schedule for who can use certain entertainment systems in the house would be more beneficial
- Household chore rotas! MAKE ONE. And everyone, and I mean everyone has to help out MALES too.
HealthyScientist 